Positive Ageing; an Oxymoron?

We attended the Positive Aging Expo last weekend, and were impressed with the number and variety of groups and agencies represented. It’s a catchy title – ‘Positive Ageing’. It captures the opportunities available to people despite reaching and surpassing their SuperGold card eligibility date; places to live, places to go, activities to do, groups to join. It’s an interesting contrast to other social influences like ‘this new product will make you wrinkle-free’ and ‘take years off your age’ and ‘you could have the body and fitness of someone half your age’. Seems that growing old is okay but looking, feeling and acting old is not so okay. In fact, it should be avoided at all costs. And there will be plenty of costs.

I’m pleased to say there was very little, if any, of that at the expo. There was a big emphasis on staying connected, which is hugely important for people as they grow older. There were also various options that encouraged people to stay active – in a sport, or a hobby group. Staying healthy was well represented too.

My wife and I were there representing Driving Miss Daisy. Our work is really focused on helping people stay connected and stay engaged in the community, despite old age, ACC injuries, mobility issues or physical / mental challenges. I was quite taken with the group beside us, U3A, the University of the Third Age, which promotes keeping the brain exercised, continuing to learn and discover with a group of like-minded people. And behind us were representatives from the Menzshed, with a spectacular display of woodwork produced by a group of men who continue to craft and build and restore all manner of things in their retirement and who share their skills with each other and with others in the community. Tracey placed an order for a large wooden platter – looking forward to that – but they make everything from toys to coffins.

Ah, coffins. I guess that’s another side to positive aging. We are all positive that we are ageing; no doubt at all. And we’re all positive that we’re going to die sooner or later. So I think a really important aspect of positive ageing is actually being prepared and being able to look ahead to see how we might cope if and/or when we start to lose things; health, hearing, eyesight, mobility, independence… And yes, even losing our lives. A good friend of ours was at the Expo and was telling me how pleased he was that someone had talked him into filling in an advanced care plan, and how important it is that people think through what they want in life, in old age, and in dying. It makes so much difference when someone has thought through some of life’s – and death’s – gnarly issues before they are suddenly and painfully confronted with them.

The takeaway for me from the Expo was really about embracing aging, rather than trying to avoid it, or living in denial about it; having a positive outlook on ageing includes knowing in advance that there are options, supports, groups, agencies and resources available to keep us active, thinking, connected, and confident that we’ve made some conscious decisions – for a time when we might be unconscious!

Oh, and that person who recommended the advanced care planning to our friend? Turns out it was Anna Loach, who was over at the Simplicity Funerals table. Turns out it’s a small old world after all…